Honeymoon is over BHO!

The president now has lower approval ratings that Jimmy Carter. Lets hope the current president is a one term president too. The funniest thing I heard today was that all the psychotic left-wing democrats are longer talking about "Health Care Reform". They are talking about "Health Insurance Reform". They are trying a different tactic to trick the American public into a government takeover of the health care industry [socialized medicine]. Lets pray they are not successful.

Are There Good People Left Out There?

Last Friday night I went to a large public gathering. While there I had to show my ID in order to pick up a race packet. Apparently, I dropped my wallet at some point between the packet pick-up and the car-ride home. I did not realize I had lost my wallet until Sunday morning when we drove home. I was pretty bummed about it. I lost my temple recommend, drivers license, credit cards, insurance cards, a costco card and a little piece of paper with lots of important stuff on it. Also $30.00 in cash. I called the bank and canceled the credit cards. Monday afternoon I went to the DMV and got a new drivers license.

In my mind I imagined some person picking up my wallet and smiling as he or she schemed on how to get use out of my credit cards and maybe steal my identity. I was sure someone was going to do something dishonest. In these days it is pretty tough to be optimistic sometimes.

This morning I was taking some trash out. I stumbled over something on my door step. It was my wallet! How in the world did it end up on my porch? I am confident a magic trick had not taken place. I opened it and everything was exactly as it was the last time I opened it. The $30.00 in cash was still there!

Here is my theory. An honest man or woman found it. He or she opened it and looked at my driver's license and saw my Name and address. They or someone they know came by my house last night and dropped it on my porch. WOW! I am very glad to report that there STILL ARE GOOD PEOPLE LEFT OUT THERE!

2009 Spudman Triathlon Report

The Spudman was fun this year. I am embarrassed to post my times. I have a really bad knee problem right now and the Sports Medicine doctor made me swear to go slow in the run, sadly I went slow in all 3 events. I ran in the Clydesdale group as usual [200lbs+]. This group used to be a bunch of slow fat guys. It has actually turned into a very fast, very competitive group. I was in wave 7. I was in the last wave and as it turns out, the hottest wave in terms of temperature. The Swim was fun and went fast. The bike was starting to warm up and I had some small mechanical problems but I mitigated them by using a different ring. I was unable to use my lower gear. No big deal though. About half way through the bike course my right knee really started to hurt. I just kept pumping. By the end of the bike course my knee felt fine. I finished strong and beat a few other Clydesdales I had been playing popcorn with. The run started and I actually felt good. There is a pretty big hill at the start of the run. I made up to the top running but my knee was throbbing and I could feel it starting to swell. I had to be a wimp and walk about 1/4 mile until i crossed the train tracks. I ran the rest of the way. It was getting really, really hot at this point. I took a liter of Gatorade with me and I am lucky I did.

Fun race, bad knee, bummer but I finished. I was 20% slower than last year. Ugh....

Mysterious St. George Mullet

Some rather intrepid Tent Trash readers on patrol down in St. George Utah discovered a very coy and mysterious mullet. This is a one-of-a-kind breed. It is essentially an inverse soul patch on the back of a shaved head. Some names include "no business up front, small party in the back" and "the wind resistant mullet". There are several theories behind this mullet. I am fairly confident that this breed of mullet emerged sometime in the late 1980's from a trailer park in Hurricane Utah. There are lots of reasons to be suspicious and cautious around this creature. As you can see from the photo, it's feeding habits include sour-cream and onion pringles and Mountain Dew. It is unpredictable, dangerous and should not be confronted for any reason. I once heard a tale of a man who asked a mullet like this for change. The guy freaked out and killed the whole trailer park.

Tent Trash Knee

I have really had some bad pain and swelling in my right knee. It has been slowing my run times down pretty dramatically and it is not the funnest part of my training lately. I have been dreading the sports medicine people because they like to talk about knives and surgery. I went today to a sports medicine Doctor and I was very pleased. Her recommendation was physical therapy and some specific exercises to strengthen and repair the torn, ligament. The X-Ray above is of my right knee this morning. No serious bone or cartilage problems. GREAT NEWS!

Pet Monkey

Yes it is true, I did have a pet monkey at one time. Here is his picture. It actually isn't a monkey but a Marmoset. You can read about the here.

Mullet-Rod

Tonight I was driving home from a relative's house and what should appear on the side of the road? Yes, the ultimate mullet-rod! It is a Ford Ranchero. This was Ford's answer to the El Camino. Nothing but class with this mullet machine. As you would expect, this lovely ride is complete with airbrushing, a phone number and a romantic half-moon. Yeah baby!

Legos and Health Care

Funny video that shows the truth about Obamacare

Tent Trash Health Care Reform

Above you can see the Tent Trash health care plan as it exists today. As you will notice it is not very complicated and the kids in my family are healthy. If you look below you will see Obama's health care plan he is proposing. Does his look any more complicated than mine? And oh, by the way, his is run by the federal government. When is the last time the Federal Government did anything efficiently or in a cost effective way? Oh yeah, never. Who wants to go to socialized medicine like they have in England and Canada? Oh yeah, nobody with any sense.

Worst Hawaiian Souvenirs

I went to the Islands for an anniversary here recently. It was a really good time. One of the things I did while was there was looking for fun things to take back to my kids. This search for souvenirs uncovered some pretty horrible items. Some were just weird, others were funny. The photo above was just bad college humor. I guess it is cool to get so drunk you throw up blood and have to crawl home.



This next one was taken at the swap meet held next to Aloha stadium in Honolulu. It is of Tupac and another wonderful role model for today's youth.



Here I found a wooden surfer Tiki guy. It was kind of hideous and creepy. I actually bought it and brought it home with me.


Another weird Tiki guy. I didn't buy this one.

Apparently Pot is a popular thing in Hawaii. There were all kinds of pot leaves on everything. If people want to wreck their lungs and break the law at the same time, I guess one of these wonderful signs is for you.



This statue of a topless woman with her daughter was like 5 feet tall and flat out creepy. It had a price tag on it for a few hundred dollars. I asked the owner of the store about it and all he said was: "It has been for sale for a long time, like 5 years...." Hmmm..... I wonder why?



Also another bad souvenir, probably the worst I saw in Hawaii were all of the Obama t-shirts and coffee mugs and what-not. I guess Obama learned some of his Machiavellian political tricks while in High School in Hawaii.



Finally another pot leaf T-shirt, right next to the Obama T-shirts.

Ridiculous Color Names

Ok. Time to talk about an extremely annoying yet pretty unimportant topic. Trendy Paint Color names. Here are some my wife brought home: Pigments Past, Blankie, Near Nakes, Quarry, whitefish, ready to wear, pasty, brule, falling star and galaxy hunter. What in the crap do these names describe? My wife is leaning toward the color "Blankie" . Can you guess what color that is? I guess the people that run the paint companies need to find ways to make "grey" sound exciting or "yellow" seem somehow more exclusive than the "yellow" sold by the next company. Free gift certificate to anyone who can tell me the RGB value of "Blankie".

A Real Hero

Hello tent trash nation. This evening, I was sitting on the couch with my wife. I saw a story on TV about a young woman named Kimbery Anyadike. This girl is 15 years old and she is solo flying all the way across he continental US by herself. I was pleased to see a positive story on TV for once. I really thought it was cool that she was doing something positive with herself and being recognized for something positive. Here is an article about her and her mission. She is flying from Compton California to Newport News, Virginia. Why can't we hear more stories about this kind of stuff instead of the disgusting media attention given to dead celebrities.

Where is Michael's brain?

A recent news story claims that the "King of Pop" had his brain removed in the initial autopsy after his death. According to the news story the tests needed to be performed on the part-time singer, full-time pervert and child molester will take nearly 3 to 4 weeks. The family wants to bury the "King of Pop" before then so he will be buried without a brain.



According to the news story this is not the first time the "King of Pop" has been without his brain. in 1978, Michael Jackson starred in a musical called "The Whiz". This was a modernized version of the "Wizard of Oz". Michael played "The Scarecrow".

As you will recall, that character was in search of a brain. It is funny that he went around most of his life acting like he had no brain, he played a character in a musical who had no brain and he is being buried with no brain. How much do you think my Michael Jackson doll is worth?

The Reverend Al Sharpton

Ladies and Gentleman, Americas' Black leaders....