iRenew Braclet Scam

I saw these snake-oil bracelets on late night TV a few weeks ago and then saw them on sale in wal-mart. I took a photo with my camera. I did some research online and found that the shady company that makes this pathetic product. Apparently there are a few hundred complaints per day with the BBB and the FTC and the rest of Obama's goons are out to get the company that makes these. My thought is: if you are stupid enough to purchase one, you should lose your $19.99. Come on people, a piece of plastic and cheap tin won't give you any health benefit. When a products reads: "May help promote......" , reasonable people should smell a rat from a mile away.....

Economic Plate for the unemployed to eat from

Anyone hungry?

Utah's Pathetic Senators

Here you see our fearless republican senators from Utah. On the right we have the pathetic Bob Bennett wearing an engineers cap. Apparently he thinks he is still 5 and wants to drive trains for a living. This would be akin to the way he has driven our country into a financial train-wreck. Luckily, this dishonest politician was thrown from power and got creamed in the primary. On the left is an equally pathetic figure: Senator Orrin Hatch. Orrin the once conservative member of congress was a co-sponsor of the Dream Act. This legislation would have given amnesty to illegal aliens. Bail-Out Bob [also known as Bird-Man Bob] voted for this and Orrin "The COWARD" Hatch skipped the vote altogether because he wants to try and please everyone. I am making a prediction right now. Orrin "the Coward" Hatch will not be re-elected in 2012. I am willing to put my money where my mouth is on this one.

Welcome to Kenya!

Satan's Breakfast Cereal: Müslix

How could we not have a serious discussion regarding Satan's favorite foods without talking about Müslix. This unholy concoction of grains, fruit and colon tingling fiber was around in the US back in the 1980s. Thankfully, Kellog's removed Müslix from the American market soon after it was introduced. Good for us and bad for Canadians because you can still buy it in the 51st state. Why the hate on Müslix? Simply put, the stuff tasted like cardboard and the marketing that tried to convince us that "all thing European" are good is lame. Anything that is marketed to me with the tag-line "Europe's finest" is a non-starter, even as a kid I knew this eternal truth. Perhaps it was a deep seated fear that if I ate the cereal I might start wearing leather pants and prancing around like most European men. Satan himself pours a tall bowl of this nasty blend of oppression in a box.

Satan's Meat: Honey Glazed Ham

Since we are talking about Satan's favorite food, how could we not mention the most vile of all pork dishes, Honey Glazed Ham. Pure Tent Trash eating etiquette calls for not putting sugar on meat. This is against the Tent Trash code of ethics. I feel gross just thinking about the big, gristle-filled slab of sugar coated meat. My distaste for pork started while living in Brazil and seeing giant pigs running wild in the street eating human sewage. since we know that animals are what they eat, I was turned off for good. While do still enjoy sausage and bacon as well as the occasional pork-chop, the sugary syrupy taste just flat-out makes me gag. Now that we have cleared the air, stay tuned for our next chapter in Satan's diet.

Satan's Sandwich Spread: Miracle Whip

Alright people, it is time for all of the loyal readers to understand what Satan himself spreads on his sandwich. Yes, Miracle Whip! This disgusting concoction of oil, sugar and Satan's special secret ingredients has been making people grossed out rapidly and slowly killing many others. You see, this is how Lucifer works. He slowly tricks people into thinking that Miracle Whip tastes good and make you feel "cool". In real life your taste buds are squirming and trying to jump out of your mouth as this vile paste gushes down your throat. Please America, abandon Miracle Whip and go back to the promised land of sandwich spread, plain old Mayonnaise.

Iraqi candy Bombing